The True Story Behind London’s Worst Restaurant
People go in search of a monstrosity. I did too. Rather, I found an outdated café, an internet smear campaign, and a well-meaning, thoughtful man with a fascinating story to tell. It’s lunchtime on a Wednesday and the Palace Restaurant Café is empty, other than Alan. He’s owned the place for 34 years and still…
LORD OF BINS, PRINCE OF CATS, MEET LAUSSE
Written for and published by whynow, September 2021 “Gather ’round, boys, girls and children; I have a fable to read to you all. Our story begins on a warm summer’s day; in a small tattered town; in a small tattered house, where a small tattered cat resided, mainly in his bed. A sad cat, rendered…
IndyRef2050
One question has dictated the build-up to this year’s Scottish Parliament elections, now less than two months away, above all others. It has affected – at times implicitly, and at times most overtly – debate over issues ranging from Covid-19 response, to NHS funding, to what exactly Scotland’s future relationship with European Union will entail.…
Tackling Tyranny
A week after Myanmar’s genocidal military overthrew its government, Putin violently cracked down on dissent, and the BBC released yet another harrowing report on the evils taking place inside China’s “re-education centres,” the squabbling West seems incapable to respond.
10 Weeks Too Many & MF DOOM
For all the unforeseen turmoil to have defined the last 12 months, one meltdown was rather predictable. There are 78 days between November 3rd and January 20th – the dates of the 2020 U.S. Presidential Election, and the 2021 U.S. Presidential inauguration, respectively. America’s 20th Amendment dictates that at least 72, and no more than…
A Welcome Deal
After Britain voted to leave the EU, this was the best possible outcome. It will be Christmas in 103 minutes. It will likely be Christmas by the time I finish writing this. For Britain, Christmas came a day early. Regardless of where one finds themselves on the broader Brexit spectrum, it takes only an ounce…
Money vs. Morals
Western sports’ two most powerful figures to have publicly criticised the Chinese Communist Party were met with hostility – and not just from China, but their own employers. Now, a contest looms. Mesut Özil has, in all likelihood, played his last game for Arsenal Football Club. At first glance, the rapid fall from grace of…
Life After 45
Let us celebrate the return of honesty and the arrival of a woman to the White House; but, to those with who we disagree, it’s time to stop saying how could you, and instead ask why do you? And breathe. America, you really had me going there. On election night I was plagued by flashbacks…
Leaving The Atocha Station
Perhaps I should be concerned by how agreeable I found Adam Gordon, the protagonist in Ben Lerner’s debut novel, Leaving The Atocha Station. I’m not sure what in particular drew me to him. It may have been his proclivity for cannabis with his morning coffee; or maybe it was his wallowing self-doubt and relentless self-pity; possibly…
Allez Paris
23rd August, 2020 Allez Paris Saint-Germain echoes through the streets, along with the smell of beer and cigarettes, the blaring of motorbike horns and the steady hum of anticipation. Bodies in blue, red and white teem out of Boulevard de Clichy’s numerous bars, leaving jubilant fans 50 feet and 100 people away from the small…
Lest We Forget: America Has A Gun Problem
Somewhere in the shithousery of 2020, I forgot about America’s gun problem. Since the start of 2017, the U.S has suffered mass shootings in Las Vegas, Parkland, Santa Fe, El Paso and Dayton – to name only a select few. One would have thought, therefore, that gun legislation would be a key campaign point for…
Two VPs; Two Americans; Two Americas.
Joe Biden has finally chosen his running mate. Though surprising to no one, the announcement of Kamala Harris remains ground-breaking nonetheless. In reality, it shouldn’t. Harris personifies so many of the values intrinsically linked to America’s identity, and those now lauded by folks in its most patriotic corners: fearless, forceful, fair. On the opposing ticket,…
Two Days Ago…
Two days ago I was denied entry to the United States. This is my account of what happened: I have lived predominantly in America for over six and a half years now. I moved to New York City aged fifteen, and then to Amherst, Massachusetts for my first three years of University. On Tuesday, I…
Wake Up Sleepy-Joe
Wake up Sleepy-Joe. It’s time to crawl out of bed. I know you’ve been snoozing the alarm for the last few months. It’s alright. I’m not angry, Joe, I promise. No harm no foul. I’m not messing around anymore though, Joe, it’s time for you to wake up. Nobody likes getting out of bed. It’s…
The Five Best Books I Read During Lockdown
5. The Year of Magical Thinking – Joan Didion Precise, poignant, and brutally honest, Joan Didion’s The Year of Magical Thinking offers a remarkable insight into the mysterious world of grief. With each phrase, detail and excruciating feeling from the tragic twelve months included, the professionally labelled ‘cool customer’ highlights how swiftly one’s world can turn upon…
We Know Better
“I’m sorry,” my Mother said, as we sat watching the 10 o’clock news. “It can’t be a very fun time to be twenty one.” “I’m not sure,” I replied, without much thought. “It’s…” I began, before stopping and searching for the rational behind my resistance. Unable to find it, I took my 2,736th sip of canned…
In Order To Demand the Truth, We Must be Willing to Accept It
Over one hundred days have passed since Boris Johnson announced lockdown restrictions across Great Britain. As our Prime Minister – a man who evidently envisions himself akin to wartime leaders such as Churchill and FDR – sat proudly in front of the Union Jack, clenching his fists in the face of looming danger, I could…
The Moon's Tirade 